Good Guests Give Good Gifts, part II

Responses to yesterday's Hostess Gift post were (as expected from our dear readership, bien sur) wonderful and unique!  Three readers sent in suggestions for more artisanal chocolates made in small shops in tiny towns.  Two of them do appear to take orders online:  The Secret Chocolatier and Norman Love Confections.  The third, Dolly Mama Chocolates, has the most wonderful website and philosophy - how can we not simply adore a chocolatier who quotes Ghandi, wants to "create beauty in life through chocolate" and whose name riffs on the Dalai Lama?!  Alas, Dolly Mama's goodies are so exclusif they do not appear to sell outside small markets in North Carolina - sigh!

Another dear reader provided excellent suggestions for buying organic, vegan, gluten-free, (etc etc) gift-worthy goodies:  Etsy.  Devoted Glam Slam readers know we believe strongly in Etsy, as noted in our 2009 post on Proper Evening Bags, and the recent essay on recycled T-shirt Couture (Jag & Nevie scarves and skirts are sold on Etsy).  Indeed, we had been so busy cruising Etsy for fabulous fashions and amazing antique gifts (a 1920s cocktail shaker shaped like a woman's leg? mais oui, we want!) that les Mesdames never once noticed that edibles were also for sale on the site.  Sally forth, dear readers, and never bring boring gifts again - there are simply too many options for a creative soul like toi!

Ho Ho Hostess Gifts!

Madame Shock recently sat down to draft a manifesto regarding what to bring and what not to bring to a party host or hostess.  But in the spirit of Christmas she has decided not to lecture, admonish, or browbeat - we all know the rules, right?  Well... maybe she'll write that missive afterall...  It's just that she's a tad foggy from a marvelous little soiree last night and hasn't the strength for numbered lists at the moment. 

She would never leave anxious party-goers hanging, however, no matter how hungover.  So Madame Chic has graciously agree to discuss only "the classics" until Mme Shock has sufficient recovered:

1. Flowers - does it even need to be said? Self-contained (never bring them without a vase or pot), low-odor (please don't clog diners' senses with heavy scents), and, if they come from your garden, pest-free!  Madame Chic once choked down an entire 7-course meal in sheer terror of the earwig that had crawled out of the centerpiece and under her plate...somewhere.  She still shudders delicately at the memory.    



Richard Donnelly's handmade delicacies

2. Chocolates - parfait... unless you know the hostess to be diabetic: small, portable, beautiful, delicious (the chocolates, bien sur, pas the diabetic hostess....).  Madame Chausseurs has been showering lucky hostesses this season with the most delectable boxes of handmade goodies from Donnelly Chocolates.  A mixed box of Spicy Chipotle, Chinese Five Spice, Saffron, Chai, and Hazelnut Gianduja morsels - all in dark chocolate or truffle versions - practically guarantees a repeat invitation. (Although -it pains Madame greatly to have to spell it out, she has taken on this task and must see it through to the bitter end: no mass-produced chocolates that can be purchased in supermarkets and chain drugstores, s'il vous plait.)



vintage scarves from Echo, Jugoslavia tourist board, and Schiaparelli

3. Wine - everyone loves wine!  Except those in recovery or staunch teetotallers.  So know your audience before showing up with a bottle of your finest.  After that perfunctory recon, any good-quality wine is always welcome, but the enticingly unusual or small-label bottles are of course more impressive.  And take care with presentation - a bow is good, an unusual gift bag is better, and something highly unusual - like the vintage scarves Madame Chausseur collects - is best.  Madame has a general thing against scarves when worn by anything other than wine bottles (ah, perhaps that story later...) but you must admit they make charming one-of-a-kind gift bags.  She collects interesting specimens in her travels for just such occasions, and is particularly fond of her 1960s-era "Jugoslavia" tourist scarf (shown above, center).  After all, dahlings, nothing says chic like a gift from a no-longer-existing country. 

Of Cowpies, Fryes, and Dyes

In a 2009 post Madame Shock did what she does best (pish posh, dahlings, no tittering, it's ONE of the things she does best): buying Louboutins for half-price and dyeing them to fit her fancy.

Madame Chausseurs - sorely put out by a victory on her own territoire - sniffed that c'est tres simple bien sur to dye suede, but leather is a whole different animal (yes, technically the same animal, but treated differently and...well, we digress...).  

Shhhh, it's pigskin...

It just so happened that Madame Chic had been shopping at that very moment.  Yes, imagine - shopping!  Standing in a tiny boutique in a tinier Wyoming town she was desperate for some very tall footwear to separate her dainty soles from the omnipresent muddy, mottled, gray-brown muck.  Madame had been blissfully enjoying a secret rendezvous on a private ranch until her dire lack of sturdy chausseurs began to threaten the romance. 

Never one to throw away a man for lack of appropriate footwear, she had located acceptable - cute, even - Frye platform kiltie brogues in the only boutique in town but - quelle horreur! - the only remaining pair taunted her from the shelf in a muddy, mottled gray-brown the precise shade of the very muck she was desperate to avoid. 

But what to do?  And what to do vite vite, before another Cowpie-in-the-Peeptoes debacle ruined another romantic, candlelight dinner in a private tent on the pampas (or whatever the term is for amber waves of grain that hide cowpies from unsuspecting fashionistas)?  The suspense! The drama! But never fear...we would never leave Madame Chic stranded with date pains in the great plains as fate reigns ... 

Everything always comes back to Audrey...

Oh, excuse nous, s'il vous plait ...the Mesdames got sidetracked in a little My Fair Lady reverie just at the exciting point in the story!  What did Madame Chic do to rescue her romance and her pieds?!  She called Madame Shock right on the spot (well, technically not on the spot, because super-secret ranches in tiny Wyoming towns get simply PAS de cell reception, but we'll skip that part of the story...).  And after a quick trip to the drugstore down the street and a purchase of one bottle of black shoe polish...voila!  You'd never know they were anything other than standard, reassuring, big-city-girl black, n'est pas?

Perfectly Un-Cowpie Black

The Shirt Off Your Back

Any girl with a colorful modern life has usually accumulated a vast cache of meaningful T-shirts. They are the never-returned T tossed on over the previous night's cocktail dress for an early morning walk-of-shame.  Or the official-issue work uniform for a now defunct hot-spot that proves you really were at the center of the universe for your 15 minutes of fame. Or that authentic vintage concert T stolen from an older one-night-stand who really "was there." (Or, if you are Madame Shock, it is all of the above and more.)

But one must admit that a stylish woman just can't wear T-shirts any more. Of course, of course, those tired magazine editorials will always advise you to spruce one up with boyfriend jeans, a belted grandpa cardigan, or a little boy's blazer from Brooks Brothers.  But no one is impressed, and certainly not if you are past the drinking age. It's still an ill-fitting T-shirt (mostly from the time before girl-fit Ts), with graphics and print that are distracting and out of proportion to your outfit. Even Kate Moss can barely pull it off.

Uncommon Goods Memory Quilt

What do mere mortals of creative chic do? We can certainly send them off for the traditional quilt-making endeavor. Uncommon Goods has a "Memory Quilt Kit" that is just lovely because you can choose one of two options: they'll send you a kit and all materials (except your Ts) OR you can just hand your Ts over to them and they'll do it.

Mais...in the beach house or mountain cabin a charming memory-T quilt can be quite delightful. But we expect a bit more oomph, a bit more...original chic...out of our possessions, non?

Angela Johnson Corset Cocktail Dress

Pssst. Come very close. Madame Chic is going to whisper. Gather up all those T-shirts and send them post-haste to Angela Johnson. She will whip you up the most scrumptious corset, Betty-Page-worthy 40s ruffle halter dress, or rollicking 50s ball gown...all with your own recycled T-shirts. (If you don't have your own, she can provide them and can even work with some theme/color requests.) Where most eco-recycling designers still seem to fall into the distressingly hippie realm, Angela has brilliantly worked her unstructured, preworn fabrics into super-structured, sexy shapes and silhouettes with rigid histories. Its a genius move, and incredibly well-tailored. (She has outfitted actresses for the Emmys and NY Fashion Week and Mad Men premieres, for goodness sake!)



Angela Johnson Ball Gown



Jag & Nevie Scarf



Never been to St. Barts or the polo match on ice at St. Moritz?  Oh dahling, not to worry, we'll never tell! We are here to provide you with a glamorous history, imaginary or real.  Run - run! - quickly to Jag & Nevie  and scoop up one of her fabulous shawls or scarves, reversible halter tops or flirty skirts.  They are all made from über-glam recycled t-shirts with various themes (as expected, Madame Chic adores the travel ones while Madame Shock favors the alcohol- and concert-themed selections).

Jag & Nevie Cape

Toddle off, now, schatzi - Madame Shock is too busy sorting through her memories. The "Club 55" T-shirt from St. Tropez? Yes. The fake Chanel T stolen from a high-school lover's mother for a walk-of-shame down 5th Avenue? Oui. The T declaring her a Teen Magazine Model Search winner? Ja. The secret-night-club staff t-shirt where she never made money but met all the models & movie stars? Oui. The t-shirt from her first concert - Sheena Easton's "Sugar Walls?" Oh yes! Dahlings, those were the days...